STICKER PACK!

I really went and did it… I made Clean Diva merch - my first sticker pack! (and not to absolutely toot my own horn, but these are the WAVIEST stickers I’ve ever seen…)

Each and every sticker was designed by me - I’ve finally found a use for my ability to operate Photoshop CS6 like its no-ones business, so each sticker has a ~ story ~ which I’ll elaborate on further on. Despite each sticker being its own little entity, the whole pack was designed to have a nostalgic early 2000s feel and is very reminiscent of my childhood, (and seeing as though 2000s babies really DID all have the same childhood, I’m sure many of you will relate to some of the references made in the designs as well).

The stickers themselves are made from super high quality outdoor standard glossy sticker sheets, so they won’t scratch and they certainly won’t rip at all, meaning you can safely stick them all over your skateboard, laptop, phone, lunchbox, your own body (idk there really are no limits), and the item will stay groovy for as long as you keep it on there! Actually on second thought please do not stick these on your body - that’s probably the worst idea I’ve had in a while.

Each sticker pack sells for 30DHS and includes 14 of these super swaggy stickers (1 of each, and then 2 of each of the cursor stickers). You can buy them on my instagram (@emmajanerobertson) over DM. If I don’t see you every day in school, I can post them to you for 5 AED extra (35AED total and the transaction will be made over Paypal, not cash), and if you live abroad I’ll post them to you for 10AED extra postage cost (40AED total). They ARE in limited quantities, but I can get more made according to demand lol.

Here is a runthrough of each of the stickers!

GET THE FR*CK BACK! - THE MOSH STARTER

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I thought I’d start with my personal favourite sticker of the pack - the ‘get the frick back’ banner sticker! This sticker, more than all of them, is very me. I pride myself in my ability to start a mosh pit at a concert, and now you can too haha! The slightly pixelated wavy font is very evocative of Microsoft Word 2007’s WordArt function, and the rainbow colours and daisy graphic gets the message across in a threateningly cute and groovy way.

LET ME CALL MY MANAGER

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The cutest little Sanyo pink flip phone to complain to your manager on. Definitely pre my childhood, but I’m sure this would have replaced my baby pink Nintendo DS if I was a teenager in this era. The screen says ‘Clean Diva’ in a matrix-y digital font.

TRAGIQUE! - FURBIES IN LOVE

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Ok, looking back, furbies are kind of TERRIFYING. Nevertheless, I had 2 of my own when I was younger and cared for them as if they were my own children. These two lovebird furbies are canoodling in front of a heart-shaped peace sign (which I used to draw on EVERYTHING I could), on a tie-dye background which would have matched by favourite DIY shirt I made when I was 10 at a tie-dye birthday party. It’s not Clean Dive if it’s not sliiiightly tragic, so the sparkly graffiti writing says ‘tragique’ because we’ve graduated from just being ‘tragic’ in english - we’re now tragic in French too.

ERROR 404 - CLEAN DIVA NOT FOUND

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Windows 2007 telling you that I’m nowhere to be found. Perhaps proceeding without my copious levels of Scorpio Energy is more of a blessing than it is a curse…

ALIEN PARIS HILTON

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Not to absolutely bring it up AGAIN, but I met my very own y2k fashion icon Paris Hilton recently in Dubai for the second time, after happening to have stayed at the same hotel as her at the same time while on holiday in Mauritius a few years ago. She truly is OTHERWORLDLY in the eyes of fashion, so here she is as a sexy green alien in her iconic 21st birthday chainmail outfit.

CLEAN DIVA BARCODE

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Inspired by the awfully 2D website logos of the late 90s and early 2000s, here is my own! Pool background because days spent in my polka-dotted bikini top and hawaiian print board shorts were my summer 2009 JAM. Barcode because this truly was an era of funky gadgets.

RAINBOW GLITTER CURSORS

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Each sticker pack comes with 2 of each type of glittery cursor. These are specifically rainbow and glittery because pre-clean diva I had a tumblr blog which I customised by messing with the html to add this copypasta coded rainbow glittery cursor. I think I got the code off of reddit, and I’m pretty sure it gave me a virus too… totally worth it though.

YOLO SWAG!

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I can’t stop saying yolo swag unironically, so now you can have it in puffy rainbow cloud font on your laptop. Words to live by, if I’m honest. Revolving around a disco ball for extra-groovy year 6 prom vibes.

GOTH FURBY

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Furbies make another grand return, but this time, it’s going through an emo/scene phase. This little guy probably listens to Slipknot and My Chemical Romance and definitely has tried to cut its own bangs, but the scissors unfortunately got caught in its checkered studded bracelet, so he walks around with a dramatically jagged black swoop over its eyes.

TAMAGOTCHI

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The hardest I’ve ever cried was when my tamagotchi pet died due to neglect on my side. I’m not kidding, I vividly remember crying so hard that I threw up on the carpet in my living room - poor girl, even poorer mom. In this sticker, I’m the tamagotchi and I promise I won’t betray you like my old tamagotchi pets did xoxo

TROLL DOLLZ LOVE

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God, I forgot how HIDEOUS these dolls were. I had a pink one, but i remember being ever so jealous of my friend Lucy who had the rainbow one. Give this sticker to your BFF, significant other, your mom, your dad, whoever makes you happier than a lil troll with static-y hair as the perfect token of love and friendship 4 eva.

EMMA'S SOUND OF 2018 PLAYLIST

following a poll I posted on instagram, it appears that the contents of my 2018 playlist is more widely desired than I thought - my ego thanks everyone who voted yes :,).

I compiled this playlist around a month ago after the award winners for the BBC sound of 2019 were announced, and decided to make my own annual compilation of songs I enjoyed listening to throughout the course of the year. Not too complicated a task to be honest - I simply compiled all the songs in my monthly playlists throughout 2018 and added a few more tracks which I thought held relative ~ importance ~.

Below is the link to the spotify playlist. ** Please note that I too am disappointed (though not surprised) at the dominant presence of mumble rap and drake songs… I really feel like i’m exposing the parts of my personality I don’t particularly want to acknowledge, whether that be to myself OR on the internet.

SPOTIFY USERNAME: emrobuk

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KHALIL - A DAVID HOCKNEY EXPERIMENT

sometime last year during my ~painful~ art GCSE experience, i created a few collages of my neighbour and close friend, khalil. the collages were actually made not long after we met for the first time whilst skateboarding on our street, which at the time was pretty awkward but I'm now left with these #funkyfresh compilations of photos capturing a few seconds in a fondly remembered (but slightly uncomfortable) moment.

the collages were a part of a study I did on david hockney, who outwardly bashed photography as an inferior art medium to paintings, saying that 'photographs don't really have life in the way a painting or drawing does'. his main complaint is that photography only captures a split second in time, whereas painting shows a timely process in which the artists in going thoughts and emotions are reflected in the brushstrokes. to be honest, I completely disagree and I think hockney was on a bit of an elitist mad one. the effort put into the composition of photographs can sometimes tell SUCH a story, and it takes such skill to capture the dynamics and thoughts going on that you want to be communicated at that split second in a single image - like when im trying to hide the fact that I hate my skin while I'm taking pictures of my makeup #ayy. 

anyway, hockney tried to overcome this issue he had with photography by dragging out the process somewhat - he created 'joiners' in which he creates one single image from many joined up individual images taken over a period of time. 

below is me hopping on hockney's clout:

 

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joiner 1:  'THE STORYTELLER'

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joiner 2:  'KHALIL - IF YOU CANT ACT NATURAL IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA JUST TELL ME A JOKE'

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joiner 3: 'KHALIL HAS FIDGET ISSUES ❤❤'

THE BREXIT SIBYLLINE BOOKS. A WHOLE MESS BUT I AM THE ORACLE. this is what I THINK will happen!

If you don’t already know, the UK’s plan for Brexit following the referendum vote of ‘leave’ is spiralling quickly out of control. Basically, here’s what’s happened so far:

  • The public wants to leave. Well, at least they DID. (hmph…) Theresa May wants to respect this referendum vote and follow through with Brexit.

  • May has proposed a ‘chequers deal’ which is widely unliked by MPs in the commons - including those from the conservative party

  • Conservative party ministers disliked this proposed deal so much that a whole bunch of them resigned from their posts on the 15th of November this year - Including Dominic Raab, the former Brexit Secretary. bruh.

  • There will be a vote in the House of Commons on this deal on the 11th of December (this Tuesday!!)

Evidently, we are not in the best of predicaments. Especially considering that it’s almost IMPOSSIBLE for this chequers deal to be passed, considering it only needs 7 Tory rebels for it to fail. Just to put this into perspective, there is an estimated 83 (!!!!!!!!) Conservative MPs who plan to vote against the deal on the 11th.

So! The media has speculated and come up with a load of different paths this could take - some saying that May will try and buy time and renegotiate the issue involving the backstop in Northern Ireland, hoping that more MPs will side with her once something more favourable is worked out regarding this. I think this ‘Plan-B’ is unlikely, Brussels has already told us this is a no-no and that they will not give much leeway on this topic.

Alas… what is May to do? To be honest - NOT MUCH. I don’t think anyone will let her. Without further ado, this is MY prediction for the upcoming course of events concerning Brexit:

1) May will not get her deal passed in the HoC on the 11th. Simple as. She does not have anywhere near the numbers for this to be a possibility.

2) In the 14 day period after this, the government will NOT lose a vote of no confidence, but neither Corbyn nor May will be able to secure a positive vote of confidence, so a national-unity government will be formed instead. WILD, I know, but there really is no obvious successor to May, unless another Conservative MP wins a positive vote of confidence (which is again, unlikely and… well… just really unexpected and odd). Basically, what this means is that a government coalition of all parties will be formed in order to deal with this more effectively. In my opinion, this would be a wise choice. Coalitions are pretty great, though it could potentially lead to an even further stalemate in negotiations.

3) There will not be a second referendum at this point due to lack of time and democratic legitimacy as it disregards the result of the first referendum. May has already shown her reluctance to do so, despite the overwhelming demands from the public and media - The Independent even started a petition! She’s called it a ‘betrayal of trust’ that ‘will not happen under any circumstances’. Even without May as leader, there just simply isn’t enough time before the 29th of March when the UK is scheduled to leave the EU.

4) The house will be reluctant to leave on a no-deal basis so will instead try a much softer Brexit in the style of Norway by joining the European Economic Area, so that the UK gets its 'Brexit' but on a surface level only, remaining in the EU single-market. Not popular with British fishermen, but its a conclusion which protects the UK’s economy somewhat and still kind of sorts out the Brexit sitch at least temporarily.

Of course, this might not happen at all. It’s a pretty intense prediction, but one I stand by! YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST!

a trip to satwa with tallulah and jason

Over half term, Jason and I popped Tallulah’s Satwa cherry and went digging together in second-hand stores for some WAVY garms. As always, I have to indoctrinate you a bit - shopping second-hand / thrifting / or shopping vintage is SO much more sustainable and ethical than buying from fast-fashion stores such as Forever 21, Zara etc. Of course, it’s not always possible to do so, but do try show the earth some love because the fashion industry is notorious for not being the most eco-friendly. Not to mention that scratching through piles of dodgy threads can be a good laugh, and you end up with super unique pieces that no-one else will have at a literal FRACTION of the price.

I made a lil video of our trip the other day - enjoy!

Music: REEL IT IN - Aminé

https://I'm_ready_to_revive_the_2000s.myspace.com/

Over the summer, in amongst watching all of Skins (which quite nicely epitomises 2008), I also watched most of season 1 of Lizzie Mcguire. I got to a point where I was watching both shows for fashion inspiration, taking screenshots of colourful hairdos and somewhat tragique layered jeans and skirts from the start of the millennium. I’ve decided that I need to share my fascination with awful 2000s fashion on my blog because A) I want to have bragging rights when these things finally ARE revived and B) to give context to my own dodgy inspired fashion choices.


WHY DID BUTTERFLY CLIPS EVER GO OUT OF FASHION?

I am unable to fault this hair style. Everytime I look at it, I hate myself for giving away my sparkly butterfly clips from 2006. So much so, that I actually bought a whole bunch of them again in order to assist my total transformation into Lizzie Mcguire. My total jealousy over Alicia Silverstone’s perfectly evenly spaced sections is yet to subside. The stray strands of hair resembling a wispy barcode-fringe? EVERYTHING.


NO SUCH THING AS TOO MUCH STOMACH.

High waisted who? Never heard of her. Everyone was malnourished in the name of fashion - after all, your stomach was the most vital part of your outfit. Oh pity on the poor souls who didn’t have a belly-button ring! As if her ENTIRE midriff isn’t enough of a statement, I also can’t tell you how much I am HERE for that asymmetrical shoulder moment that Paris is bringing to the table.


HAIR THAT LOOKS LIKE STREAKY BACON BUT MORE EMO: A GOOD IDEA.

I’m not going to even try to act like Christina Aguilera (or Xtina. Remember she called herself that for a while?…) didn’t INVENT this look. A dramatic combination of jet black underneath and platinum blonde on top was clearly the best way to give your hair ~ dimension ~. Literally NOTHING else screamed ‘ultimate goth gf’ like this hairstyle did. Xtina founded it, Avril Lavigne bettered it, and Xx_emo_sk8rgrls_xX around the world tried helplessly to DIY it in their bedrooms whilst listening to MCR on CD.


NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST BIT ATHLETIC, BUT YOU’D NEVER KNOW.

Even if you didn’t do sports, you had to look like you had just come out the gym (without a drop of sweat and head-to-toe in a matchy-matchy designer outfit - how else?). Aaliyah wins this one with her Tommy Hilfiger pants sagged so low that she could have been the first female member of Dipset. Note how she still has a belt though - I guess it’s the thought that counts?


CHAIN-MAIL. PARIS’ NIPPLE COVER IS SHOWING. BUT IT'S OKAY BECAUSE HER ENTIRE OUTFIT IS SPARKLY.

Forward to 15 people in the next 8 minutes or Paris Hilton in her 21st birthday glitter chainmail outfit will appear in your room at 3am tonight. There’s also something quite CASUAL about lil kim’s composition (far left), in which she rocked up to the Grammys wearing no trousers. Nobody questioned it though, because at least in this outfit, her weave was in 1 part. (see pic below from the 2001 VMAs, featuring lil kim’s wig laced to…well…the other half of lil kim’s wig…)

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TREND PRIVÉ WEBITORIAL

Following the Volant Editorial (which I am yet to shut up about), Erfan and I decided to try our luck with another editorial for Trend Privé magazine. For the first time, we were able to get a wardrobe and accessories supplied to us by UAE based designers Dee By Dalia and Eve Michelle, which was massively exciting, and quite the step up from buying and later returning Zara clothes when we were finished with them - a pricey and risky habit, but all in the name of fashion I guess.

The amazing model for this editorial is my friend Rachel Murphy, and of course, the photographer is Erfan and the makeup artist is me.

THE MAKEUP:

I wanted to achieve a high-impact glossy red look, starting with simple glossy lids and a glossy red lip,and later graduating to smeared red glossy eyelids with bold brows.

Products used:

Foundation and Concealer - Model's own

Blush - Benetint by Benefit

Glow - NYX Away We Glow in 'Crystal Glare'

Gloss - NYX clear gloss

Lipstick - Lancôme L'absolu Gloss Matte

Eyes - Lancôme lipstick, Venus I Palette by Limecrime, and NYX gloss

Brows - Bobbi Brown gel ink liner in 'caviar'

Below are the pictures, but CLICK HERE to go to the actual webitorial itself

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VOLANT EDITORIAL

GCSEs are finally done, and my blog finally starts to exist again!

If you follow me on literally ANY of my social media, youve probably noticed I haven't been able to shut up about my make-up and magazine features I've worked on with my kindered creative spirit Erfan (@erfans.photography).

Doing editorial style makeup has always been a passion of mine: the idea of completely changing and enhancing your features on its own is fascinating, but then being able to WEAR the artwork afterwards brings a whole new level of courage and pride into your work - even if it means you're strutting through Dubai mall with blue eyebrows and red glitter freckles (quite an experience to say the least).

It's been so interesting working in a modelling agency studio with erfan and our amazing models, who are mostly our own friends, which makes the whole creative process so much more fun. Friends also seem to have a lot less attitude and yell at you a lot less... (we've had our fair share of fashion industry divas to say the least...)

The first editorial Erfan and I did got published in Volant Magazine Issue 60 - Elegance. I cannot put into words just how exciting this was for both of us, hence my endless rambling about my utter disbelief for getting featured among such talented upcoming artists.

I'll link the E-book magazine below, but will also pictures from the shoot. A hardcopy of the magazine is still available to purchase I believe; of course, at a fee, but everything looks better on glossy paper so its definitely worth the small premium! (Not that I'm at all biased...)

the editorial itself is shot by Erfan Shekarriz, makeup done by Emma Robertson (myself) and modeled by the gorgeous Sara and Kaya Geha.

https://volantmagazine.de/2018/02/volant-adore-06-elegance/

The pictures included aren't full res because I'm travelling at the moment, but they're decent quality. However, the pictures included in the magazine are maximum resolution so go there for more detail!

my FAVOURITE makeup look to do, using my favourite mac pigment in Old Gold mixed with a heavy clear gloss. [Model: Sara Geha] 

my FAVOURITE makeup look to do, using my favourite mac pigment in Old Gold mixed with a heavy clear gloss. [Model: Sara Geha] 

[Model: Sara Geha] 

[Model: Sara Geha] 

[Model: Kaya Geha]  

[Model: Kaya Geha]  

[Model: Sara Geha]  

[Model: Sara Geha]  

the following three aren't included in the final Volant editorial, but I'm so proud of them so I thought I'd post them here as well.

[Model: Kaya Geha]  

[Model: Kaya Geha]  


 [Model: Kaya Geha] 

 [Model: Kaya Geha] 

[Model: Kaya Geha]   

[Model: Kaya Geha]   

launder clothes, not ca$h

Amongst exams and other things, I've been a bit useless with keeping this blog updated, I know - but I'm super excited to show you all some of the things I've been up to (think magazines and makeup!!).

The pictures below are from a piece of art I did on money laundering where I vandalized t-shirts with 'LAUNDER CLOTHES NOT CASH' in acrylic paint. I used a similar process to that of my painted jeans, but this time I made a stencil before I painted because I'm a bit useless at freehand lettering.

Up until about 6 months ago, I was naive to what money laundering is and the massive corrupt schemes that take place in my own city! Always fascinated with the flaws of the elite, I did some reading on it and was inspired by the double meaning of 'launder' and 'dirty money'. After having created the shirts, I invited my two friends Jade and Inayah round for lunch, a casual radical discussion on the bourgeois and to model these shirts for my journal:

 

 

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Lessons 2017 taught me (audio included)

PLAY THE ATTACHED AUDIO FILE BELOW FOR ME TO READ ALONG WITH YOU. (Or so that you can be lazy and not read at all! Everyone is happy!)

For me, 2017 was a pretty good year. I made some awesome new lifelong friends, built on friendships with old ones and traveled to countries I never thought I would ever see in the flesh. Of course, not all of it was easy - far from it in fact. Though, many experiences, whether it was a positive or negative one, taught me something valuable which I'll be sharing in this post.

1. PEOPLE ARE GOING TO JUDGE YOU NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO.

Sure, people say they're non-judgemental or whatever but the truth is, people suck. Kids can be really mean! God, I used to be so absolutely cripplingly self-councious - I'm sure most of us were (or are for that sake). I was so afraid of doing what I wanted in case that someone might judge me, or lose respect for me. The thing is, it was all stupid things, like wearing the clothes I want to wear, or listening to the music I like, or posting things on social media that I thought were interesting. What a waste of time and energy, honestly, on keeping OTHER PEOPLE HAPPY with the sacrifice of LOSING MYSELF and WHO I WANT TO BE. Dude!

And the longer I tried to be everyone else, suppressing who I wanted to be, I realised that people were STILL judgy. Not just towards me, I'm not special - just in general. No matter what you do, people are always going to hate your guts, or disagree with your vision or think you're strange - the list goes on.

2017 was the year I realised the only person worth keeping happy is yourself. DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO! If people talk badly of you behind your back because of it - THAT IS THEIR PROBLEM. You don't like what I post? Unfollow me. You don't like what I wear, or how I do my makeup? Say it to my face. Because in this outfit, I feel more confident than ever. I look good. You don't like me or my friends? Don't talk to us! It really should make absolutely NO impact on the way I want to live my life - and finally, I found this was ringing true. You don't think I'm cool? WHO DEFINES COOL?

2. WHO SAID COOL WAS PREDETERMINED?

It isn't. For me, being your own person is cool - not the stuff that your own person is interested in. Listening to solely anime soundtracks and only wearing the colour purple isn't cool in principle, but in practise. Liking something because you HONESTLY like it - not because it's 'trendy' or 'edgy' and having CONFIDENCE in it by not caring about what anyone thinks? That's cool. And trust me, it shows. You can completely tell who is glowing in self confidence from across the room. I'm not saying I'm there yet - but 2017 was when I noticed HOW COOL AUTHENTICITY IS  - no matter how awfully cheesy that sounds. 

3. SOME PEOPLE AREN'T WORTH YOUR TIME. 

You don't have to agree with everyone. You don't have to like everyone and see good in everyone. To be honest, you don't HAVE to do anything. The sooner you realise that, the better. You don't owe anyone anything. That doesn't mean you shouldn't respect everyone, but if someone isn't worth your time - YOU DON'T NEED TO GIVE IT TO THEM. It is SO important to hang around people who honestly and genuinely make you the happiest person on earth when you're with them.

But it's also important to remember that if you've decided that someone isn't worth YOUR time and thoughts, they can still be important and worthy to others. And that can hurt sometimes, but I learnt to understand that people need different things and people in their life.

4. BE PATIENT.

This, again, sounds like I've just gone on some juice cleanse and bulk bought vegan chocolate, but KARMA COMES BACK AROUND. IT REALLY DOES. I am such a strong believer in karma, man. I've noticed that you seriously get back what you put out whether it's on the larger scale of life in general, or just your attitude towards one person in particular - you always get what you deserve. Even if it takes a while. 

After all, GOOD THINGS TAKE TIME. HAPPY 2018.

 

 

face earrings, face masks, and jason.

I've been experimenting with wire as a medium recently, and I've made a set of wire earrings. This, like many of my other projects, was completely unplanned. The idea sprang to me when I got distracted in a crafts store trying to buy thread - needless to say, not much thread was purchased. 

The earrings themselves are little minimalistic wire drawings of faces, looped directly onto an earring hook. I'm considering selling a couple of pairs sometime soon - so if you're interested, let me know and I'll find the motivation to make a couple more pairs to sell in limited amounts on here.

Below are pictures of the earrings very kindly modeled by my gorgeous friend Jason, in between face masks and bags of prawn cocktail chips. Also by the way, if anyone knows what prawn cocktail actually IS please do tell me because I'm having doubts that prawn cocktail is an actual food. Honestly, I have never seen it exist organically, only in packets of chips.

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autumn & issue 1 of THE COLLECTIVE

Recently, I have been working alongside a few other youth artists on a project led by my friend Zamiya Akbar - THE COLLECTIVE zine. It's an international self-published zine based on youth art, activism and mental health, and I'm extremely excited to join the team as a staff contributor.

With the first issue focusing on the theme of the new season, warmth and change, I submitted a poem along with a makeup look; completely self-shot and edited (with the help of my gangly arms and mirrors). The poem 'autumn' was written during my trip to England over the Summer, and the pictures were actually shot in a coffee-shop bathroom for the soul reason that I liked the light fittings by the sinks (thankfully, nobody walked in on me squatting by a basin with my arms wrapped around a lamp). The pictures (included below) feature on a 2X double page spread in the first few pages of the zine, which you can access via the following links:

THE COLLECTIVE ZINE

Issuu: www.issuu.com/thecollectivezine/docs/the_collective_1

Website: www.thecollectivezine.tumblr.com

Instagram: www.instagram.com/thecollectivezine

Enjoy!

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painted jeans

I COULD convince myself otherwise, but painting my jeans was really just an elaborate way of putting off doing my summer homework; but to be fair, after seeing the works of other artists, in particular Miranda Makaroff, I had been thinking of doing something along these lines. It was only my deep-rooted procrastination and laziness which gave me the instinct to do it NOW; instead of doing the five artist research pages and cold war notes which are due the second week of September. A truly sensible choice. 

Miranda Makaroff is a graphic designer and artist who I found on Instagram (@mirandamakaroff), who works with loud shapes and bold colours. She had painted a denim jacket in her signature striking style - which gave me the inspiration to paint on jeans in a similar pattern. 

I drew on the shapes on the front of the left leg and back pockets and decided to stop there before I turned a perfectly fine pair of average-quality jeans into clown pants. Thanks, by the way, to my mother for giving me that analogy and permanently instilling the image of a circus performer in my mind whenever I wear the jeans.

I think probably the best decision I made while painting the shapes was to prime them all with white paint. Before I added any colour whatsoever, I painted the shapes in white acrylic. This was probably the second most painstakingly tedious thing I’ve ever done (beaten only by my notorious stain tapestry); though it made all the colours of the paints pop so much more and become less prone to cracking as they are worn.

Below are a collection of pictures taken by my amazing friend Jason in and around Al Quoz on an outing together. Right before I just about died of heatstroke of course, and had to run to Adventure HQ to buy hydration salts (the things I do for a quality post, I swear). By the way, I do not recommend the lemon flavour of hydration powder you get from there - it tastes like dish soap. However, the awful taste means it’s quite effective as a vomit-inducing medication - learnt that one the hard way.

 

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warm memory i. - a poem

This is a poem I wrote recently during summer, about one of many happy times with my friends. Poetry to me is but a hobby, so by no means am I expecting everyone (if anyone) to read or appreciate what I write. But on the slight off-chance that maybe my writing will resonate with or be enjoyed by someone; below is my poem, titled 'warm memory i.'

warm memory i.

soft hair chokes my ears

rosy lobes drowning in sweaty locks

gentle stares crescendo to glowing hugs

tourist fingers on my homeland head

tangle the shorter strands, north of my neck

 

my tailbone tingles

my fingers fizz

cradled by the mattress, my cheek rests on another’s jeans

quiet friction on dark-wash denim

 

a background silence

a silence not empty, but not substantial enough to be noticed

simply absorbed by the plants

and the sandy shoes in the corner

 

a foreground noise

a noise composed of vibrations that echo between the three lovers

reflected on each other’s eyes

and read by our lips

 

the old spaghetti-scented air, with every breath

delivers a spaghetti-scented love note

an inhale, an exhale

a sensual exchange of pasta-perfumed happiness

 

sore bones,

joint cramps

cushioned by two foreign pairs of trousered legs

against my own

 

the simplest form of contentment

reciprocated and relished

in the shape of an equilateral triangle

 

the friends exist in a triple harmony

platonic affection

kisses without contact

the moment lasts

 

  • emma robertson

23.7.17

summer makeup lookbook

I'm actually not sure what a lookbook is, so just forget that part of the title - it makes me sound serious and like I know what I'm doing. 

This was actually quite a highly requested post, despite my eyeliner skills being timely and average at best. So, thank you, I suppose, for enjoying the way I paint my face; that's always flattering to hear. I guess I'm also surprised that people think theres *a way* a do my makeup - you'd laugh at how much guessing takes place in front of the little mirror on my stool at home.

Nonetheless, for the sake of a new post, I'll try my best to pull together a few looks I have enjoyed doing, for summer in particular. Perhaps I'll explain how to achieve them (that is if I can remember myself). Give the people what they want, am I right?

COLOURED EYELINER

THIS TOOK ME FOREVER TO DO. This was also guesswork - I don't have a particular way to do my eyeliner because I manage to mess up even worse with every method I try. I shed tears on this eyeliner (no exaggeration). I was frustrated beyond belief when I failed to make my left wing match my right wing.

Eyes - Sephora coloured liner

Eyes - Sephora coloured liner

Eyes - Sephora coloured liner

Eyes - Sephora coloured liner

Eyes - Sephora coloured liner

Eyes - Sephora coloured liner

 

YELLOW

Recently, I purchased a yellow single eyeshadow from Kiko Milano in shade 19. At the time, it was an impulse buy, but I've honestly really enjoyed the colour. I usually don't use this colour alone, and often use it as a base or blend it in with other colours (specifically the shade 'creation' from the LimeCrime Venus palette; and 'mousse' from the TooFaced Semi-sweet chocolate bar palette). I also enjoy the way it looks with a coloured liner.

Eyes - Kiko Milano single in shade '19', and Limecrime Venus Palette's shade 'Creation'

Eyes - Kiko Milano single in shade '19', and Limecrime Venus Palette's shade 'Creation'

Eyes - Kiko Milano single in shade '19', and Limecrime Venus Palette's shade 'Creation'

 

RED

Lips and eyes, but maybe not together. For most red eye looks, I use my beloved Venus palette (buy it, by the way. Honestly the best purchase I have ever made). And for the lips, I use Kat Von D's everlasting liquid lip in the shade 'Berlin'. Sometimes, I'll apply 'Bleached' (Velvetine by LimeCrime) in the centre of the lips to add dimension. Or at least that's what I think it does. Honestly, I do it to convince myself I'm sophisticated.

Venus Palette by Limecrime on eyes

Eyes - Venus Palette by Limecrime

Eyes - Venus Palette by Limecrime

Eyes - Venus Palette by Limecrime

Lips - 'Berlin' Everlasting liquid Lipstick by Kat von D

Lips - 'Berlin' Everlasting liquid Lipstick by Kat von D

Lips - 'Berlin' Everlasting liquid Lipstick by Kat von D

 

BLUSH

This is probably the only component I actually have a technique for. As someone that blushes SUPER easily (to the point where I've been asked whether I've been running around outside when in reality I'm just slightly nervous); I use a coral coloured blush. Anything too pink makes me look, well... like myself when I'm answering a question in maths. The actual blush I use is a really disgusting jelly-like cream blush that I got in year 5. It is genuinely the most crusty thing I own, yet i insist on using it. It claims that it's Maybelline, but I got it in China (so it's probably fake). The hinge on the cap has rusted and it smells kind of weird too, but it does the job.

I apply the blush in a somewhat line, from the apples of my cheeks, connecting over the bridge of my nose. Basically, where you would sunburn. Don't overdo this, though. Sometimes because i'm fake, I add a few small freckles on my nose and cheeks over the blush using a brown eye pencil - where freckles on your face would naturally occur during summer. Highlight is also a part of this look, but frankly I can get away with just the grease on my face most of the time.

Cheeks - Some crusty fake Maybelline product from 5 years ago that honestly induces nausea in small children and probably contains rat poison

Cheeks - Some crusty fake Maybelline product from 5 years ago that honestly induces nausea in small children and probably contains rat poison

Cheeks - Some crusty fake Maybelline product from 5 years ago that honestly induces nausea in small children and probably contains rat poison

All pictures are taken by my brother, Rhys, and edited by myself.

flower shop - a local band and their local gig

Last Saturday, I spent my evening in Alserkal Avenue (Dubai) to attend Flower Shop's first public gig. And I loved it.

Half the reason I came was to support (and embarrass) one of my best friends, Jason, who plays bass guitar for the band - although I knew from videos I had seen that this wasn't an event to miss; whether you are connected to the band through friendships or not. The band itself is a group of four friends: Oscar, Jason, Saffron and Kyle; with Oscar on vocals and guitar, Jason on bass, Saffron on guitar and Kyle on drums. You can find the band on SoundCloud by clicking here. 

I arrived 15 minutes before the gig was said to start, and already the atmosphere was awesome. I talked to people who all seemed as excited as I was - some friends, some strangers. During this time, being the *incredible* small-talker I am, I managed to completely humiliate myself and make a couple of awful first impressions (note to self: don't talk about your dad's toenails to people you met 5 minutes prior. It's not as funny as you think it is). Thankfully, just as I managed to find my way out of that awkward situation, we settled down for the gig to begin.

The setlist was thoroughly enjoyable, and if I wasn't going to bond over my dad's toenails with anyone, at least we could all appreciate the great music. The band had such a strong and positive stage presence, and this was certainly reciprocated by the audience through occasional whoops and declarations of love for the band members. A few of my personal favourite songs were played, as well as some originals composed by members of the band:

My Kind of Woman - Mac DeMarco

Cracked - (original by Oscar)

The Pool - Slow Hollows

Backstreets - (original by Oscar)

Treat Her Better - MacDemarco

Jam/Interlude - (jam written by Saffron)

Elevator - (original by Oscar)

I Can't Admit It's My Fault - (original by Jason)

Free Mason/Jam - (mash of How to Fly - Sticky Fingers and Chamber of Reflection - Mac DeMarco). Can be heard on the band's SoundCloud. 

My Kind Of Woman (encore) - Mac DeMarco

All in all, the atmosphere was amazing, and was matched by arguably more amazing live music from the band. Congrats to the whole of Flower Shop- and keep your eyes open for them in the future. A truly wonderful performance.

Below are some pictures of the evening - enjoy:

The band performing: taken by myself

The band performing: taken by myself

oscar - vocals and guitar: taken by emma (myself)

oscar - vocals and guitar: taken by emma (myself)

saffron - guitar: taken by emma (myself)

saffron - guitar: taken by emma (myself)

oscar and saffron: taken by emma (myself)

oscar and saffron: taken by emma (myself)

kyle - drums: taken by emma (myself)

kyle - drums: taken by emma (myself)

jason - bass: taken by emma (myself)

jason - bass: taken by emma (myself)

flower shop performing: taken by lily sullivan

flower shop performing: taken by lily sullivan

Don't forget to like and share this post! (Also please credit owners of the pictures if you repost). 

where are you from? a letter to third culture kids.

PLAY THE ATTACHED AUDIO FILE BELOW FOR ME TO READ ALONG WITH YOU (or maybe you're just lazy and can't be bothered to read....that's cool too...)

Dear third culture kid,

Where are you from?

Honestly, I don't know either - but perhaps that's something we can live with for now. A sense of belonging is not one you've experienced all too much, yet you experience it all the time. Everywhere has become your home, and believe it or not, your passport has little to do with it. Your visas are irrelevant. The stamps don't mean much. They're all just places you once belonged to, scattered like ashes across the world - without knowing too much about one place or another.

You've tried to belong to the country your family belongs to, but your passport disagrees. You don't speak their language, and your mother blames herself for this. You blame yourself for this, too. You come from the same bloodline of a group of foreign people who you don't understand, and because of this, you pretend to have lots in common with them. And you love your extended family, don't get me wrong, but you can't remember when last you felt like you were just as big a part of them as the other cousins are. You don't go 'home' for the holidays, you go back to your passport country, or your family country, or perhaps you stay in your resident country. One of these is meant to be home, or a version of it at least; but the country you miss the most is neither of these. You are a living embodiment of 'home is where the heart is', but you're not even sure where that lies. But just because you're untraditional, it doesn't mean you're impossible. Sure, it's harder - but only because it's not the norm. Your family consists not just of your bloodline, but your adopted family of people you love, like you - scattered. You have 'family' in places you've only been to once, yet your emotional connection to these people is beyond that which is restricted to whereabouts. You have learnt that where you are doesn't matter all too much.

To an extent. Your heart still aches when you hear the name of your favourite place on earth. No matter how out of place you feel there. A caucasian girl is the most comfortable in China - that's how it played out for me. It sounds odd, but the sense of belonging I receive from that place is much more than I receive from the 'home' the government has given me; or the 'home' my roots try to pull me back to.

You're allowed to be upset. Belonging is complex and not worth the tears, but letting go is all too difficult a task. I know. We've all been there. Your friends are always better and more worthy in the last place you were in, the grass is always greener on the other side, and it'll seem like this for as long as you go on. You miss everybody you've met like they're your own severed limbs. They don't grow back, and aren't replaced without them feeling artificial and unauthentic. I guess, sometimes typing *hug* over Skype doesn't quite cut it...

Moving is so short, belonging takes so long.

Emma.

final piece - the idea

Last week I finally pushed aside all my excuses and doubts about my art final piece and started it (about time, emma, considering everyone else had started a good week before you...). I think part of the reason I was so reluctant to start it is because it was just another thing to do. On top of exam revision and homework, the last thing I wanted to be doing is hand-stitching a 2X1 metre tapestry. 

Our topic this year was 'bashed, smashed, broken and trashed'. Honestly, when I first received the topic, I was not too thrilled - perhaps I was afraid of my final piece resembling myself too much (you know... trash...). But as I came to terms with it, and as we explored the topic as a class, I ended up loving it. There was so much freedom, and I loved that my journal didn't always have to be pristine and perfect. I was also exposed to many amazing artists, such as Grayson Perry and Doris Salcedo, with awesome philosophies and just as awesome work.

I'll skip past most of the journal work for now - maybe I'll include that in a later post; and I'll fast forward to one of the final tasks we were set as a class before we were asked to work individually. As a set of 20 or so tasks, I was asked to 'record dropping coffee from different heights':

(click to enlarge pictures)

Fascinated by the change in from the two different heights, I outlined the spill shaped in my beloved black ink pen. I liked it. It reminded me somewhat of a map, with coffee coloured islands on a white sea. Not quite a poet, but that's quite poetic?

I wanted to try this with a different substance, preferably one with an entirely different consistency - so I used glue. From the heights of 200cm and 20cm, I spilled glue onto a page and drew around the dried product as I did with the coffee.

The glue dropped from 200cm produced an interesting shape, which I then went on to create a linoleum block of so I could mass produce the shape.

I printed this shape onto anything and everything I could find. Magazines, books, graph paper, felt, towels, canvas bags - you name it. Anything that could take water-based printing ink was branded with the delightful shape of a glue spill.

(click to enlarge pictures)

However in doing so, I noticed that some of the prints done on fabric lacked the sharp outline I was after. I had to draw around the prints like I drew around the coffee spill to get the affect I was after - so I abandoned my pen (gasp!) and stitched around the glue spill print on the canvas bag in the brightest thread I could possibly find in the cupboards of the art department. This was the result:

(click to enlarge pictures)

orange thread 1
orange thread 2
orange thread 3

I loved the way this looked. I took absolutely ages, to complete, but it was worth it. I decided to recreate the previous coffee spill on fabric so I could stitch around that too. Again, I loved it. It took millennia to do, but maybe that was the whole point? The spill takes moments to create and the embellishments take so long?

(click to enlarge pictures)

coffee 1

Sounds like a concept for a final piece...

That got me thinking. I thought for way too long. It must have taken me a week to finally come up with the idea I was going to go through with for my final piece. A week filled with learning how to use the sewing machine (and breaking it too - sorry Mrs. Bailey...); printing out pictures of asian scrolls; and convincing myself that I had more time than I actually did.

Below is the final plan for my final piece: a 2X1m tapestry of sorts, showing a turmeric stain, stitched around in blue, beneath a coffee stain, stitched around in burgundy. All of this would hang from the wall, and would be held taught by bamboo. I still need to buy bamboo. Where from, I have no clue, but I need to buy bamboo.

(click to enlarge pictures)

plan1
plan2

So now, I actually have to create my final piece. I'll post in the future when it's finally complete, but I'm nowhere near finished (and I'm nowhere near as stressed out as I should be).

Finally, do me a favour and like and share the post down below!! :,)

macron and le pen. vive la france?

As many of you may know, the French general election has become of recent news with the first of the general election results coming in yesterday evening. And (dare I say, unfortunately) the two remaining candidates are: Marine Le Pen, from the far right National Front party and Emmanuel Macron, candidate for the En Marche! party. Now the two candidates differ drastically in stances, policies and what they believe is best for France. To be absolutely honest, what's best for France is for neither of them to be in power, however, that of course is my humble opinion and not the point of this blog post. 

Marine Le Pen

Firstly, on to probably my least favourite candidate from my least favourite party (also, warning in advance, please look elsewhere if you're looking for an unbiased summary). Marine Le Pen. Or France's petite Trumpette. 

I don't know whether it's the unconsidered nationalism in her stances that ticks me off, or the similarity of her views to those of Trump and Nigel Farage (oh yes, my favourites...). In fact, they mirror them so much that a possible 'Frexit' is on the table, but that will be explained later.

NATO and EU

I'll start with the stance that irritates me the most. Le Pen's desire to leave NATO. That's right, Le Pen stated that the North Atlantic Treaty Organisation exists only to 'serve Washington's objectives'. I would just love to point out at this time that NATO was in fact created BY France and other Western countries during the Cold War to form an alliance organisation of sorts. In short, If France were ever to be attacked or get in a national pickle, NATO would be there to scoop them up and defend them. But of course, we want to leave.

Like NATO, Le Pen is pro 'Frexit'. She wants out of the EU, and if she can't get that, she wants at least out of the Euro (which currently is stronger than the dollar. Yes, let's get rid of that. Great idea, Marine). Of course, this was expected from the National Front - and was done in a cliche way: in the name of sovereignty. But, I can see where Le Pen is coming from (or I can try). To be fair, the unemployment has been high in France in recent years, and economic growth has been slow. Introducing a lower value currency, 'Le Nouveau Franc' would make French exports cheaper, thus making it cheaper to buy French goods with foreign money.

Globalisation

As much as I hate to say this, I kind of resonate with Le Pen on this topic. Globalisation simply put, is the free spread of commerce between nations - creating a 'borderless trade' as such. I think international trade is an amazing thing - and it strengthens countries and their businesses and economy. But, I also believe that such trade and globalisation should be monitored closely. And I'll tell you why. 

For example, in nearly all countries in the world, one can purchase American goods, for example a Coca Cola, or a MacDonald's hamburger (not necessarily a good thing...). This creates consistency in the worldwide market - but it also creates an extremely wealthy elite. You see, because of the spread of these companies, it has now become almost impossible to start a successful business of your own - you're constantly being outsold by these massive franchises that play the worldwide econ plus market by quashing and buying out the competition. Ah, good old capitalism back at it again. So now, most purchases are unethical and in support of these huge corporations and as a result, local businesses are not supported.

Le Pen dislikes globalisation because of this 'elite' which is created, which makes it harder for French products to thrive in their own country. However, she dislikes it to the extent of wanting to PULL OUT of the Canada and EU trade agreement. This is where I start to disagree. International trade should be present - I mean you can't expect to have ONLY French products, the market has demands. Also, international trade like this grows economies drastically and quickly. It just needs to be monitored, so that it doesn't go horribly wrong; as seen in the USA, where the top 50 richest people are also richer than the bottom 50% of the population.

Immigration

She is also very anti-immigrants (but what were we to expect, after all she IS the candidate of the NF). Le Pen wants to introduce a policy that will make it harder to become a French citizen, tying in with her nationalist approach of 'make France more French'. This is all fair and well, but then things start to get slightly xenophobic and Islamaphobic. Marine states she wants to close all 'Islamist Mosques'. Awesome, now the French muslims, (YOUR people, Marine!!!), do not have a place of worship. All the recent terror attacks have only strengthened her point by reaching out to scared people. It seems like a quick fix to someone who doesn't realise that extreme Jihadism is only present within an extremely TINY population of muslims worldwide.

Her phobia of Islam is highlighted in her statement 'And all the little ones (young immigrants), who used to come home with my daughters, they went swimming together — and now they are all wearing the veil.”. To someone (with a brain...) this seems like an odd statement to make -what does wearing the veil have ANYTHING to do with France? Ah, but of course, the Hijab is a symbol of oppression to Marine and definitely not a symbol of France. So, undoubtedly, she dislikes it.

Not only this, but she also intends to make it harder for immigrants to find jobs by reducing labour taxes on companies who hire only French nationals. So, now it is no longer the most qualified person who gets the job, it's the one who is the most French. And I don't know about you, but I would rather receive medical treatment from a Syrian national with more qualification and education than a less qualified French national. But then again, I'm not sure, maybe wanting the most qualified people in jobs is a thing only I like...

 

Emmanuel Macron

Emmanuel's stances pretty much entirely contradict Marine's. As in, COMPLETELY - their stances may as well be on opposite ends of a magnet, they disagree so perfectly. This makes my points easier to explain, as most background information on the stance topics were mentioned in Le Pen's stance run down.

NATO and EU

Macron hasn't mentioned NATO as much as Le Pen has - probably because he wants France to stay a part of it. However, he has said that he does not back an expansion to NATO that is not directly wanted by, or beneficial to France. So I guess if you're situated outside the Balkans, or are Finland or Sweden, you're going to have to do some real kissing up to France if you want to join NATO. As for the EU, Macron believes that France should keep a firm FREMAIN. For him, the Euro and the European Union is what keeps France strong and sees no reason to allow Frexit to happen. Which is fair enough, since the elections, the Euro has increased in value by 2% and really, the French economy is not in enough trouble to introduce a plan B currency.

Globalisation

Macron is pro globalisation, and is the only French presidential candidate to have explicitly stated so. Not a fan of this policy, but it does mean he wants to keep the Candada-EU trade agreement, so I guess there is an upside to it all. 

Immigration

Unlike Le Pen, Macron (unsurprisingly) is not quite pro-immigration, but rather doesn't mind it. He says that no further efforts should be made to make it harder for immigrants to seek asylum in France, and job openings should be made to accommodate the surge of immigrants from the war-torn areas of the Middle East. I imagine him adopting a similar policy to that of Germany - who have proudly opened their doors as a safe haven for immigrants; as he has previously praised the efforts made by the nation. But in light of the recent terror attacks, most recently in Champs Elyssees and Paris, the frightened people of France haven't been completely convinced by this idea.

 

Now, since neither of the candidates won 50% or more of the votes in the 1st general election, they will go head to head in a second general election of which we will find out the results on the 7th of May. Maybe, if we shout 'vive la revolution' loud enough, neither of these candidates will gain power; but, something tells me that probably won't happen, so I guess we've just got to keep our fingers crossed for the best, and hope that all the world leaders don't gradually turn into Trump groupies...

 

lines with a pen

If we're honest, the magazines in my living room serve no purpose but to *decorate* the coffee tables and to make it look like the Robertson family are classy, avid 'Homes and Gardens' readers. I remember when I was younger, I used to give the people in magazine adverts makeovers with my friends. We used to sit in our bedrooms and colour their eyelids garish shades of blue and hold beauty pageants for them; and of course, not much thought was put into what we put on their faces. In all fairness, I was 6 - the most thought I put into anything was whether I wanted a chocolate or strawberry milk in my school lunch the next day. 

So recently, in true 6-year-old Emma style, I drew over some of the faces I saw in magazines. When drawing the lines onto them, I wanted to try and capture the energy I received from the pictures; with some faces being more striking and angular, and some being kind and rounded. Now whether I did that effectively (at all), is up for debate - the lines I gave them are reflective of how I interpreted their expressions.

Below are the results of my experiment - enjoy!

 

 

my first and favourite piece of this series

my first and favourite piece of this series

the second piece

the second piece

"SERIOUSLY?!! that's AMAZING!"

"SERIOUSLY?!! that's AMAZING!"

a full body picture instead of just a head. harder than the rest - I was confused about the distribution of lines on her body, but I think it turned out quite nicely.

a full body picture instead of just a head. harder than the rest - I was confused about the distribution of lines on her body, but I think it turned out quite nicely.